I’m In Two Minds About Vipassana
Harmless meditation course or brainwashing cult? A detailed account of my experience and why I left after five days.
June 24th 2019 — I’m in Phitsanulok bus station, Thailand, where I arrived exactly a week ago.
I have five hours to kill. But that feels like no time after recent events.
This post begun in my head a few days ago — but I had no pen and paper.
I had no communication tools or devices.
I had no one to talk to except the voices in my head.
I was worried I’d forget my words, but I had no choice.
I had to trust myself to remember.
I’d travelled to Phitsanulok to complete an 11 night, 10 day Vipassana.
I arrived at this remote location the day before so I’d be at the centre on time.
It never even occurred to me I’d leave early. Historically, I am not a quitter.
But yesterday I left Vipassana — on day five.
It was the hardest decision I’ve had to make in a long time. But as I write, my toes tingle and legs spasm.
They are sensations— physical reminders — that I did the right thing.
